Funny Radio Commercials

“Beat-Yourself-Up Hotline” | Funny Radio Commercial & Good Copywriting Example

Copywriting Examples, Humor Writing, Radio Commercials

“Beat-Yourself-Up Hotline” is a 60-second, funny radio commercial, written by Walt Jaschek and produced by Paul Fey for Smartship.com. It stars Stewart Sloke as a caller to the hotline; turns out he’s very, very good at beating himself up. This spot also provides a good copywriting example; the script is below the video. Listen and enjoy.

Can you beat yourself up as well as THIS guy?

“Beat-Yourself-Up Hotline” | :60 Radio | Script by Walt Jaschek

HOTLINE WORKER: Beat-Yourself-Up Hotline.

CALLER: Is this Beat-Yourself-Up Hotline?

HOTLINE WORKER: Yes sir, if you’d like to beat yourself up, this is the place to do it.

CALLER: Okay, I’d like to beat myself up now, please.

HOTLINE WORKER: Go right ahead when you’re ready.

CALLER: [Ahem.] I am so stupid. I can’t believe how stupid I am. What an idiot. I left all my holiday shipping until the last minute again. Now it’s a huge hassle. Why do I have to do this to myself every year? When, oh when, will I learn?

HOTLINE WORKER (genuinely impressed): You beat yourself up very well sir.

CALLER: Thanks.

HOTLINE WORKER: But maybe you should just go to smartship.com.

CALLER: Smartship.com?

HOTLINE WORKER: Right. Type in your zip code, and smartship.com tells you the fastest, easiest, most affordable ways to do your holiday shipping, even at the last minute.

CALLER: Wow. Smartship.com

HOTLINE WORKER:Mmm-hmm.

CALLER: Why didn’t I like of that?

HOTLINE WORKER: Well…

CALLER: Why do I have to have somebody else tell me what to do?

HOTLINE WORKER: Sir…

CALLER: When, oh when, will I ever have an original idea?

HOTLINE WORKER: You are really good at this, sir.

CALLER: I’ve been told it’s a gift.

ANNOUNCER: Smartship.com. The way smart shipping is done.

© Paul & Walt Worldwide. All rights reserved. If you want a commercial like this, contact us and we’ll craft one equally funny and memorable.

Listen to our entire playlist of funny radio commercials on YouTube.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel, “Good Copywriting Tips and Examples.”

“Viva La Volvo” | Funny Radio Commercial and Good Copywriting Example (Spot and Script Included)

Humor Writing, Radio Commercials

“Viva La Volvo” is a 60-second radio commercial written by Walt Jaschek and produced by Paul Fey for the Southern California Dealers Association, and amusingly depicts a woman’s love and obsession with her Volvo. The spot won many ad industry awards and serves as a good example of funny radio copywriting. The production technique, energetic music cutting in and out of one-liners, has served Paul and Walt well over the years. Take a listen.

“Viva La Volvo” Script by Walt Jaschek

MUSIC: HORNS AND DRUM UP, SUDDENLY OUT

ELLEN: Friend of mine said he wanted to talk to me about my Volvo. I said, “Thank you — that’s between me and my gynocologist.”

MUSIC: HORNS AND DRUM UP, SUDDENLY OUT

ELLEN: He said, “No, no, your car — your Volvo 850 Turbo Sportswagon.” I said, “Oh, that. No, you can’t drive it.”

MUSIC: HORNS AND DRUM UP, SUDDENLY OUT

ELLEN: Oh, I love my Volvo. Sure, it’s safe, but, gee, just because driving on the freeways of Southern California is the equivalent of playing bumper cars at the speed of light, what kind of reason is that?

MUSIC: HORNS AND DRUM UP, SUDDENLY OUT

ELLEN: Volvos are still ultra-luxury imports. Sleek and gorgeous and loaded to here. Safe and sexy and… (BEAT) pardon me, I have to go hug my car now.

MUSIC: HORNS AND DRUM UP, UNDER

ANNOUNCER: Want safe AND sexy? Viva La Volvo! Test drive a Volvo at your Southern California Volvo dealer.

MUSIC: HORNS AND DRUM UP, SUDDENLY OUT

ELLEN: “Since when is safe sexy?,” another friend asked. “Hey,” I said, “what decade are YOU living in?”

MUSIC: HORNS AND DRUM RESOLVE INTO FINISH

© Paul & Walt Worldwide. All rights reserved. If you want a commercial like this, contact us and we’ll craft one equally funny and memorable.

Listen to our entire playlist of funny radio commercials on YouTube.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel, “Great Copywriting Tips and Examples.”

“Missing Persons” | Funny, Clio-Award-Winning Radio Ad for “Matlock” (Good Copywriting Example)

Award-Winning, Copywriting Examples, Humor Writing, Radio Commercials

“Missing Persons” is a funny radio commercial created by Paul & Walt Worldwide for the syndicated run of the TV series “Matlock” starring Andy Griffith. This spot, written by Walt Jaschek, produced and directed by Paul Fey, garnered many ad industry awards, including the Clio Award for “Best Radio Copywriting.” It stars voice talent Tom Poston and Harvey Atkin.

Click and enjoy!

It’s also a good copywriting example. Here’s the script.

“Missing Persons”
:60 Radio
Script by Walt Jaschek

SFX: Telephone ring, followed by phone pick-up

TOUGH-TALKING COP: Missing Persons.

GOOFY GUY (phone filtered:) Missing Persons?

COP: Missing Persons.

GOOFY GUY: My wife is missing.

COP: Your wife is missing?

GOOFY GUY: My wife is missing.

COP: When did you last see her, sir?

GOOFY GUY: Four o’clock.

COP: Four o’clock?

GOOFY GUY: Four o’clock.

COP: Uh, where’s your TV, sir?

GOOFY GUY: The bedroom.

COP: Have you checked IN the bedroom, sir?

GOOFY GUY: No.

COP: She’s probably watching “Matlock!”

GOOFY GUY: “Matlock” is on at four o’clock?

STERN COP: Every weekday at four on Channel Two. Go check your bedroom, sir. I’ll wait.

GOOFY GUY: Okay.

[LONG SOUND FX STRETCH: Goofy guys puts down the phone. He walks down a hallway. He opens the bedroom door. We hear a few seconds of Matlock (“Your honor, I…”) The goofy guy closes the bedroom door. He walks back down the hallway. He picks up the phone.]

GOOFY GUY: Hello?

COP: I’m here.

GOOFY GUY: She’s watching “Matlock!”

COP: I thought so.

GOOFY GUY: I didn’t know “Matlock” was on at four o’clock.

COP: Every weekday at four on Channel Two.

GOOFY GUY: She really likes Andy Griffith!

COP: Of course she does.

GOOFY GUY: She was so busy watching “Matlock” that she forgot to tell me where she was!

COP: Tell her I understand.

GOOFY GUY: Okay.

SFX: The goofy guy puts down phone, walks down hallway again.

COP: Wait! I didn’t mean now! Sir? Sir?

SFX: Goofy guy opens bedroom door. Matlock is still playing.

GOOFY GUY: Hey! My favorite episode!

ANNOUNCER: “Matlock.” Weekdays at four on Channel Two. Because there’s nothing like a good mystery!

COP: I’m hanging up now sir. Sir?

© Paul & Walt Worldwide. All rights reserved. If you want a commercial like this, contact us and we’ll craft one equally funny and memorable.

Listen to our entire playlist of funny radio commercials on YouTube.

Subscribe to Walt’s YouTube channel.

“The Ballad of Judge Wapner” | Funny Radio Commercial for “The People’s Court”

Humor Writing, Music, Radio Commercials

The late Judge Joseph Wapner ruled on “The People’s Court.” This funny radio commercial for the King World syndicated TV show, produced by agency Paul & Walt Worldwide, honored the Judge’s commanding presence in the form of a mock, country-western-style “ballad.”


“The Ballad of Judge Wapner”
Lyrics by Walt Jaschek

MUSIC: COWBOY BALLAD-STYLE, UNDER

COWBOY: He sits in judgment / He stands for the law / Kinda looks like a hero / And sounds like your Pa

BACK-UP SINGERS: WAPNER!

MUSIC: HARMONICA WAILS

COWBOY: He smiles and he laughs / His voice tinged with gravel / But the bad-guys just gasp / When he bangs his big gavel

BACK-UP SINGERS: WAPNER!

COWBOY: Judge Wapner.

BACK-UP SINGERS: JUDGE WAPNER!

MUSIC: HARMONICA WAILS

COWBOY: When neighbors brawl / When lovers refute / When suppliers and buyers and liars dispute / Wapner won’t let those lawbooks get dusty / Got a buddy named Doug / And a sidekick named Rusty

BACK-UP SINGERS: RUSTY!

COWBOY: With Wapner.

BACK-UP SINGERS: JUDGE WAPNER!

MUSIC: HARMONICA WAILS

COWBOY: Doesn’t do it from towers / Doesn’t do it from steeples / He does it in court / A court called “People’s”

BACK-UP SINGERS: WAPNER!

COWBOY: “People’s Court.”

BACK-UP SINGERS: JUDGE WAPNER!

COWBOY: Call him “Your Honor.”

COWBOY: JUDGE WAPNER!

MUSIC: HARMONICA WAILS, UNDER

ANNOUNCER: Judge Wapner RULES… on “The People’s Court.”

COWBOY: Song over.

BACK-UP SINGERS: SONG OVER!

MUSIC: HARMONICA WAILS AND FADES OUT

© Walt Jaschek and Paul Fey. All rights reserved.

Walt Jaschek home | Walt Jaschek contact
YouTube playlist of our other funny, award-winning radio commercials: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list…

“Star-In-Your-Own Radio Commercial” | Funny Spot for Budweiser Long-Necks

Concepting and Copywriting, Humor Writing, Radio Commercials
Here’s the version of the spot we did for men. We also did a version for women. Will find that and post soon!.

Guys! Have you ever wanted to star in your own beer commercial? Well, now you can, thanks to this Budweiser radio spot that will “cue” you to say *YOUR NAME* during a very romantic scenario. So open a couple of long-necks and enjoy your “date” with a woman who is, evidently, “both a neurosurgeon AND a swimwear model.” We think you’ll do very well in your first commercial! Let us know how it goes.

Writer: Walt Jaschek | Producer/Director: Paul Fey | Agency: Paul & Walt Worldwide

Listen to our full playlist of funny radio commercials on You Tube.
Subscribe to Walt’s YouTube channel.

Walt Jaschek Looks “Professorial” Promoting Webster U. Radio Class.

Appearances, Radio Commercials, Teaching, Walt a Life

waltnow-walltjaschek-whiteboard

Come on, a little too professorial. The elbow patches are spot on, sure, but who lines up markers like that, and why would the guy who tries to simplify everything write so much sh*t on the board?

“Don’t blame me,” said Walt Jaschek. “I’m teaching radio advertising again at Webster University School of Communications during the Spring, 2018, semester, and a student at the end of class snapped at pic on my phone.”

At your own request?

“Well, sure,” Walt admitted. “I promote the class as a way for advertising majors to learn to strategize, write, produce, cast, direct and engineer a original, 3-spot radio campaign — — and I wanted to look the part.”

Walt’s slogan for the class, which is filled with mostly funny radio, old and new: “Laugh Your Ads Off.”

That might be better slogan than the one he had for his previous presentation to UMSL ad students about thinking big: “Let Loose the Large.”

Okay, “professor.” Just please don’t tell us you have a pipe in your pocket.

P.S. Hear funny radio commercials co-created by Walt.