Copywriters in Love

“Copywriters in Love” is a romantic comedy screenplay by Walt Jaschek, in progress here before your eyes. Feel the love unfold…

Copywriters in Love: The Prequel
“How to Kill a Pitch:” It’s amazing what copywriters will do. For love.

By Walt Jaschek

STUDIO LOGO over stirring music

PROMO ANNOUNCER: Now. From the studio that gave you…

A group of people staring at a TV in a conference room.

PROMO ANNOUNCER: “Media Buyers on a Binge-Watch”…

A rowdy bunch of people drinking at a bar.

PROMO ANNOUNCER: And “Account Executives Off Site”…

A series of steamy shots of a few, diverse couples, moments as if taken from romance novel covers, changing with these beats:

PROMO ANNOUNCER: Comes the jargon-filled romance sizzling with sin… and syntax. “Copywriters in Love.” Wordsmiths who never dangle participles. Or bury the lede. When these writing partners aren’t massaging body copy onto a squeeze-page… they’re prying open rate conversions with S-E-Oh, my. Even after hours, they’re placing headers. And pulling footers. From a heat map above the fold. Can they keep their jobs… and their oxford commas?

Close-up on the actors as the announcer names them.

PROMO ANNOUNCER: Spurl Neiman. Rebecca Shoreline. Lil’ Brag. And Walt Jay as the Agency Owner Who Should Have Retired By Now.


Then back to steamy shots.

 PROMO ANNOUNCER: Copywriters in Love. They know features and benefits… and friends with benefits. But now? All bets are off.


PROMO ANNOUNCER: Copywriters In Love. A booty call to…


A man’s hand holding a remote. He’s just turned the TV off.

WOODROW’S VOICE (finishes the phrase) “Action.”

Reverse angle from the TV as we see who’s watching it. It’s WOODROW WILCOX, a 20something copywriter in his living room. He’s good-looking, but it’s early: he’s in frumpy, unglamorous sleepwear, has a bad case of bedhead and his coffee cup is a Marvel mug. There’s a dog asleep on the sofa. Holding the remote out, Woodrow is slightly perplexed by the content he’s just seen.

WOODROW: Wow. (beat) I had no idea we were in such a sexy profession.

The dog looks up.

WIFE’S VOICE (from off): What was that, honey?

WOODROW (yelling back): I had no idea we were in such a sexy profession!

WIFE’S VOICE (from off): How do you mean?

Woodrow starts to answer, decides to shrug it off and return to waking up. He exits, scratching himself. It’s an unglamorous moment, but these, too, it seems to say, are Copywriters In Love.



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St. Louis media history rediscovered! Here are KMOX-TV Channel 4’s “Big Mistake” commercials from 1985, alerting viewers to an error in TV Guide magazine. Writer/director: Paul Fey. Guy on camera: me! Yes, that’s me, Walt Jaschek, at a studio in KMOX-TV (St. Louis,) performing on-camera in 1985. I recently found these spots on 3/4″ tape, … Continue reading “Big Mistake” | Funny TV Campaign for Channel 4 St. Louis (1985)

Walt & Don Launch Boastess® Fructose Pies™

We needed a funny product for a funny comic we’re creating. The thought of emulating a certain sweet treat often featured in the comics of our youth? Delicious. Boastess® Fructose Pies™ There’s a sugar crash in every dash! Concept: Walt JaschekPackage design and copy: Don SecreaseStay tuned to see what we do with these! The … Continue reading Walt & Don Launch Boastess® Fructose Pies™

Christopher McKarton: Retired Detective

He’s seen it all. And solved it all. But when an 8mm movie of his past shows up, Christoper McKarton might be back in the game. The Retired Detective A novel with video By Walt Jaschek My name is Christopher McKarton. I’m a detective. Or I was. I’m retired. Blissfully. I prefer detecting buds in … Continue reading Christopher McKarton: Retired Detective

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