Today on Walt Now: a true story of some late-night Amazon shopping that might have involved a glass of wine or two. Walt Jaschek unboxes a package that arrived unexpectedly – and shows us what was inside.
Aaaaaand we’re home.
Oh sure, it was fun spending, with wife Randy, 10 nights and 12 days in an all-inclusive Club Med-style resort with free ice water and unlimited I.V. drips. Let’s call it a “hospital.”
And it’ll be odd to not be able to just pick up the phone and order French Toast and Baked Lay’s. (Knowing full well they will somehow instead deliver Baked Toast and French Lay’s.)
But somehow we will proceed without a full staff of registered nurses, hospitalists and friendly floor moppers.
Back here at Apt. 1-B, I will be the hospitalist and floor mopper for a while. There will be caregiving ahead, but don’t worry, I have two allies: extra-strength Excederin and extra-strength Chardonnay.
It was roughly on the 7th day of this journey that Randy took a positive turn. ‘Til then, my poor, sweet wife was fighting a tick-born infection and its side effects – “Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever” isn’t just a John Denver song.
For days, she had but two modes: highly agitated alertness and a medicated, faraway fugue-state.
At about 10 a.m, I had just finished writing a long paragraph in my prayer journal. (Not a joke: I’ve been writing down prayers all my adult life, to good effect. I mean, I’m still here, right? And they’re still making Spider-Man movies?)
Anyway, at the end of the paragraph, I wrote the words, “Help me help this girl back.” I hit “save.”
Within two minutes, I heard her say, “I think I’m feeling better.”
Sure enough. She was smiling, sitting up in bed like Dorothy at the end of “Wizard of Oz.” (“And YOU were there! And YOU!”)
“Th… that’s good to hear,” I said, cautiously.
“In fact, I think I’ll get up and take a shower.” She hit the nurse call button.
“Eine gute idee.” (I’ve been talking German to her lately. Don’t ask me why.)
“Also, I’m starving.”
“Can you please go get me a Goodcents sandwich? I’ll have an 8-inch Italian on wheat, with Provolone, lettuce, oregano, and salt and pepper.”
“Could you be more specific?”
“And oil and vinegar.”
“You got it.”
“And Baked Lay’s.”
Again with the Baked Lay’s.
I’d like to say it was smooth sailing from there, but there were frustrating symptoms still to treat, such as a lingering headache: mine. (Just kidding.)
But today, a lovely Sunday, with the doctors in syzygy (“si-je-zee,” a term from my word-a-day calendar meaning celestial alignment) and souvenir shampoos in hand, home we were sent.
Your well-wishes and prayers helped do the trick, as well, and don’t think we don’t know it. So it is with great appreciation we toast you with… what else?
A little something chilled.
“SCENE!” So closes Level 1, my first-ever improv comedy class at the Improv Shop in St. Louis, an 8-week learning experience and personal stretch. Was it challenging to keep up with the keen, comic minds you see here? “Yes, and…”
(That’s me top row, center. And that’s instructor Ben Noble upper left. He’s amazing and this class is highly recommended.)
Public nudity? Office nudity? As in, a clothes-optional office? Imagine it! In the 1980s, Walt Jaschek was working as a creative director at The Flynn Group advertising agency in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Meanwhile, Rick Zahradnik, a writer and director in the same city, was concocting a video parodying the kind of mundane office-rental videos both Rick and Walt were creating. The result was “Offices in the Raw,” a Rick-directed comedy video, starring Walt as the curly-haired newcomer to a very nude office. It’s all PG-13, though. This is the version of the video that appeared on the syndicated “Video Challenge” TV show in the 80s. Oh, the 80s! We miss you!
Here’s a short video of creator at large Walt Jaschek (aka Walt Now) and his wife, the funny and brilliant Randy Rosenbaum, enjoying a “Pre-Muny” picnic in St. Louis Forest Park on Randy’s birthday, June 24, 2019. Watch for the comical “chair fail” near the video’s end.
P.S. You don’t see as much of Randy as you should on this site, and Walt is going to change that.
On a June 16, 2019 Fathers Day visit to Cape Albeon Senior Living , Walt Jaschek asked his 92-year-old Dad, Walter Jaschek Senior, to “SAY Happy Fathers Day” to the camera. When Walter Senior began to SING “Happy Fathers Day” instead, Walt and his wife Randy just went with it and started singing, too. Happy Fathers Day, everyone!